A Year of No Regret
Philippians 3: 12
– 14
Introduction
For
thousands of years, people have been making New Years Resolutions. (And, I would like to add…For thousands of
years, people have been breaking their New Years Resolutions!)
The
tradition of New Years Resolutions can probably be traced back to the Roman
Empire and (maybe) even the Babylonian Empire.
These ancient peoples began a new year by making promises to their
gods. Their promises sounded a lot like
our New Years Resolutions. They promised
to live better lives and to accomplish all sorts of good in the world. I wonder if they were any more successful
than we are with all our promises and good intentions.
Did
you make any New Years Resolutions this year?
Have you had a chance to start working on them yet? Exercise, eat right, get organized, read more
books, read the Bible through in a year…
If you haven’t started, don’t worry.
There hasn’t been a Monday yet. I
think you have to wait until Monday to make any significant lifestyle
changes. My diet always starts on
Monday.
One
way to approach New Years Resolutions is to set a lofty goal and use the new
year as an opportunity to accomplish that goal.
Like reading the Bible through in a year… You can’t read the entire Bible on a Sunday
afternoon. But, you can read it through
over the course of 365 days.
Another
way to approach New Years Resolutions is to focus on a small behavioral change
with no real thought about the long-term goal.
Like eating less junk food or exercising a couple of times each
week. The long-term result will be a
healthier body / life. But, we can
achieve that by taking small steps along the way.
A
third approach to New Years Resolutions is to quit or to stop doing
something. Two very popular New Years
Resolutions are to quit drinking alcohol and to quit smoking.
What
if we set a New Years Resolution this year to stop doing things we regret? Or, we could state this in a more positive
way by saying we want to live a life of no regret.
What
would that look like? A life of no
regret. Perhaps we could look to the
Apostle Paul as our example. Paul was a
man who came to the end of his life with no regret.
Philippians
3: 12 – 14 …
As
we have read the Book of Philippians together, we have discovered from chapter
one that Paul wrote this letter “in chains.”
I believe Paul was being held under house arrest in Rome and was
awaiting a decision from Caesar about his future. The Jews had accused Paul of inciting a riot
in Jerusalem, so Paul was arrested and sent to Rome to appear before Caesar. Caesar could do one of two things with
Paul. If he found Paul innocent of the
charges against him, Paul would be released.
If he found Paul guilty, Paul would be executed by beheading. So Paul waited, knowing he faced the very
real possibility of death.
If
we place Philippians 3: 12 – 14 in this context, we can hear that Paul is
thinking about his death but has no real regrets about his life.
Paul
knew that he was not perfect. He
admitted that in verse 12. Since he was
not perfect, he could have made his own New Years Resolutions. Paul could probably stand to lose a little
weight. His toga was a little tighter
than it was five years ago. His
cholesterol was probably higher than Dr. Luke wanted it to be (although he
probably did follow the Mediterranean Diet).
Paul
knew he was not perfect, but he also knew that God did not expect him to be
perfect. God expected Paul to be
faithful. Faithfulness is what Paul had
in mind when he said that he presses on “toward the goal to win the prize for
which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Paul was not perfect, but Paul had no
regrets. He continued to live faithfully
in an effort to do the work God had called him to do and to be the person God
had called him to be.
In
2012, a Hospice nurse in Australia wrote a book about her experiences working
with people who knew they were facing death.
(I haven’t read the book, but I have recently found a couple of articles
based on the book).[1] She had gotten to know her patients and had
meaningful conversations with them. She
learned a couple of very interesting things about the last days and weeks of
life. She writes about how people seem
to have true clarity of what is most important in life when we know we are at
the end of life. She also observed that
many people express regrets about the way they lived their lives. In fact, she summarized these regrets in her
book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.
1.
I wish I’d had the courage to live a
life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2.
I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3.
I wish I’d had the courage to express
my feelings.
4.
I wish I had stayed in touch with my
friends.
5.
I wish I had allowed myself to be
happier.
Authentic Life
I
wish I had lived a life true to myself and not the expectations of others…
Young
people have dreams of what they want to be when they grow up and ways they want
to change the world. But somewhere along
the way we stop dreaming and we start meeting the expectations others place on
us.
As
Christians, we are not supposed to give up on our dreams. That is to say, we should not give up on our
dream to be the man or woman God wants us to be. God has created each of us with a unique set
of spiritual gifts, passions, dreams and life experiences. No one is exactly like you. God has a plan for YOU that is different from
God’s plan for me or for anyone else.
Paul
knew what God’s plan was for his life.
God called and gifted Paul to be the missionary to the Gentiles. God wanted Paul to leave the geographical and
religious boundaries of Israel. God wanted
Paul to travel to non-Jewish places and tell non-Jewish people about God’s love
and salvation. Paul lived a life of no
regrets, because he was faithful to that calling. He lived up to God’s expectations and not the
expectations other people placed on him.
Balanced Life
I
wish I hadn’t worked so hard…
This
was the number one regret of men who were facing the end of life. They felt like they had missed out on their
children’s life and had neglected their wives because of all the time they
spent at work.
I
don’t think men (or women for that matter) should stop working altogether. There is something satisfying about a hard
day of work and knowing that you can provide for your family financially. Instead, I think we could all benefit from a
more balanced approach to life. There is
more to life than work, because there is more to life than money.
Jesus
talked about this in the Sermon on the Mount…
Matthew 6: 19 – 21…
19 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where
thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves
treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy,
and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For
where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
There
are two problems with living an unbalanced life.
Anything
we sacrifice for the sake of work is something less valuable to us than our
work. Some people sacrifice family for
work. Some people sacrifice their own
health and life for work. Some people
sacrifice their relationship with God for work.
Jesus
also said something about a second problem with living an unbalanced life…
Matthew 6: 25 – 27… 25 "Therefore I tell you, do
not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or
about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and
the body more important than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of
the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly
Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than
they? 27 Who of you by worrying can add a
single hour to his life?
Jesus
used the birds as an illustration of what it means to depend on God. Later, Jesus made a similar point using the
wildflowers as an illustration. Birds
and wildflowers depend on God to meet their needs. Humans are no different from birds and wildflowers. We depend on God to provide the food we eat,
the air we breathe and the life we live.
When
our lives are out of balance, it is because we think we are in control. We think the world depends on us. We live as if we do not need God to provide
for our needs.
Deep Life
I
wish I had expressed my feelings…
Many
people go through life living very shallow lives. A shallow life encounters many people but does
not experience deep relationships with anyone.
This is shallow, because it does not meet our very basic desire to know
and be known by other people. Knowing
and being known is more than just intellectual knowledge. It also involves sharing our deepest emotional
needs with others.
There
was a time in my life when I was very suspect of emotions. I thought logic and reason were superior to
emotion. For some reason I didn’t
realize that God created our emotions in the same way that he created our
ability to reason.
Connected Life
I
wish I had stayed in touch with my friends…
Human
beings were not created to be alone.
This concept is revealed in the story of Creation in Genesis 1 – 2. After God created the heavens and the earth,
God filled the earth with plants and animals.
Then God created the first man.
After each of God’s creations, God said, “It is good.” But that is not what God said after creating
the first man. Instead, God said, “It is
not good…” God said, “It is not good for
the man to be alone.” God created a
partner for the first man, so he would not be alone.
It
also shows up in God’s words when he created the first man. In Genesis 1: 26, we read, “Then God said,
‘Let us make man in our image…’” I find
it significant that God speaks in the plural—“Let US make man in OUR
image.” God speaks in plural, because God
is Trinity—Father, Son and Holy Spirit. As
Trinity, God lives eternally in relationship with the Trinity. Therefore, God created you and me in the
image of God—to live eternally in relationship.
Have
you ever wondered why the worst punishment a prisoner can face is solitary
confinement? That is because it is
unnatural for a human being to be isolated from others.
Have
you ever wondered why we spend our developmental years in families? That is because God intends us to interact
with others and know how to get along.
This is best learned in community.
Have
you ever wondered if church is important?
Yes, church is important. That is
because we develop and grow in community with others and because it is
unnatural for a Christian to be isolated from other Christians.
Joyful Life
I
wish I had allowed myself to be happier…
Happiness
is elusive. People who pursue happiness
discover that it does not come easily.
And when we do find happiness, it does not seem to last very long. This is why it is better to speak about Joy
than happiness.
For
Christians, there is a difference between happiness and joy. Happiness can be affected by circumstances
(or by how much money is left in the checking account). Joy is different. Joy is a gift from God. Joy can be received, but it cannot be
achieved. The world does not give us
joy, and the world cannot take it away.
Joy
is the result of having a relationship with God…of ordering our lives and
priorities according to God’s will…or, as Jesus said in the Sermon on the
Mount, to seek first the Kingdom of God.
Matthew 6: 31 – 34…
31 So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we
drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32 For the pagans run after
all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But
seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these
things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore
do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has
enough trouble of its own.
Conclusion
According
to the book, The Top Five Regrets of the
Dying, people who are facing their own death have an incredible sense of
clarity about what is truly important in life.
I wonder…Why do we have to wait until we are facing death to understand
what is truly important? Why can’t we
live in 2014 with that kind of clarity?
Why can’t we begin right now living a life of no regret?
When
you come to your deathbed, what will you regret?
No
one says, “I wish I had spent more time at work.”
No
one says, “I wish my house had been cleaner.”
No
one says, “I wish I hadn’t spent so much time at church.” Or, “I wish I hadn’t spent so much time
reading the Bible and growing closer to Christ.”
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